HOW TO CREATE CHANGE
I can only speak for myself, it has been a long healing journey and I would like to, help to shorten yours if that is what you want, to enable you to find a happier way forward, every single day, not just now and then, but to feel that deep knowing of ‘Yes I am ok’
I have given and received various Complementary therapies, in my search for respite from the unhappy feeling inside, the self-doubt, shame and insecurities. For myself, it has meant delving back into past to find the source of this pain, that has been a painful journey, but it helped me to know why I had such self-doubt and responses to life that did not sustain me. It is not always necessary or desirable to know all of this, but to have an idea when it all began and in my experience the first incidents that changed my inner world began in childhood, creating a wounded very sensitive child. It can also be inherited, genetically through the ancestral line and from past lives if you believe in those. Sounds like a lot to investigate, but it does not have to be, bear with me.
As the now child/adult, looks for ways to heal this feeling of discontent, which is coming from the wound deep inside now, probably out of her awareness, so unknown to her, she searches out adults with similar energy patterns to the familiar ones in her childhood, to play out the scenario in the hope of healing it (to get a better or different result than when she was a child), this is all going on unconsciously, most of the time. Unfortunately, she goes round in circles, creating more of the same feelings unless the adults find a way to create their own healing. In desperation, the child/adult tries, now, to heal the other child/adult in the relationship. This creates tension, blame, resentment, the other, does not think there is anything ‘wrong’ with their behaviour, they may not be interested in changing/healing, instead possibly thinking the same as she is and trying to heal her, creating a ping-pong of blame going back and forth avoiding change (thinking it is too scary or they might lose something of themselves).
We don’t actually need to change, we just need to find out who we really are underneath the inherited stories, which then allows us to let go of self-doubt in all its forms, becoming so much more and feeling so much better about who we are.
The answer is staring us in the face, right there, ‘let go of trying to heal others and create your own true story, a story about what you really, really always wanted out of life’ Do you even know that you are allowed to do that, or even have another story underneath all that inherited STUFF? Yes you do! You may already be finding it, but the old story keeps popping up, because you don’t realise it is not entirely yours, causing havoc sometimes.
Creating that story with other caring women around you, in a workshop, heals, soothes and brings hope, enlightenment and inspiration to move forward in a new and positive way to heal you………………………………………… THE WOMEN WHO WANTS CHANGE!
My old story - I was a person who was responsible for finding solutions for everyone else, thinking a lot of the time it was my fault when things went wrong and ‘treading on eggshells around others’. This created a platform for everyone else except me to do well, I had let go of responsibility for myself and ‘put all my eggs in their baskets’ my life was empty, like the ‘eggshells I was treading on’. Don’t, get me wrong, I loved helping others, but in the process I put me to one side because, I did not believe I had a right to put myself first, a deeply engrained gender belief. The irony is, when we put ourselves first, we create a strong healthy environment to be the best we can for others, without taking away their responsibility for themselves, but guiding them, authentically with no self-agenda.
My new story is, I am now using my experiences to create a loving, caring sanctuary for myself inside, this story then helps me grow and share a loving, caring sanctuary for women and myself to grow in leaps and bounds to find out WHO THEY ARE REALLY ARE and create the new authentic story of who they were born to be in this life. This creates real self-belief coming from my inner wisdom, which has always been there, just waiting to be discovered. WOOP WOOP.
My inner little girl can now feel free to find the fun she so deserves……………
I believe it now, I just have to be patient………………that’s the tough bit.